How does it feel to kill your best friend?
Whatever the suffering I have saved her from,
Should it have been my choice at her end?
She couldn’t look after herself – agreed,
but was it then not my job to do so?
I chose to spare her no more instead.
And it feels like I have killed my best friend.
The burden she carried with every slowing step,
Now mine to take with me into my every future moment,
How will this feel in a day, a week, a month, a year?
Will I ever remember this fondly?
or will the memories we made be forever tarnished
with this hatred of myself
and the choice I felt I had no choice but to make?
I could not have loved her more and yet,
It feels like I have killed my best friend
Thank you and I’m so sorry xxxx